*wateverrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!*

hey pplz wassup? i hope u r all gir8 and having a gir8 time anyways i just wanted 2 write up about something dta i'm feeling right now well......u know how in America there was this storm "KATRINA" so ya u know it's funny how now EVEN america has REFUGEES
WELL IT'S SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT...
well u know wat i am suppose 2 go now so ya i betta go and will right next time ok take care smell ya laterz u bootiful pplz!

hopelessness...!

hello pplz it's been a long time since i posted last time in ma blog anyhow 2nite i wanna right abt ma friend who had the courage 2 trust me and tell me everything there was toknow abt her life and beyond....

anyhow today it was da 1st day of my new job and i worked 4 da 1st time in ma life and now am very exhausted but i really wanna share this with u guys and that is that this friend of mine whome i think of as ma little sis "M" she came with me to the place i was going and had to go to the doctor regarding her "pimples"...arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh... (don't u just hate them)

she told me that the mother she's living with is not her real mother but infact she died when "M" was only 8 and wasn't aware of anything and so her father married another women. "M" told me dat she had committed suicide a few times by eating a handfull of panamax pills and she was vomiting and stuff and it was all b'coz her step mother got her engaged with a guy 2 months younger then her who's still in overseas and she hates him, she says they used 2 play 2gether when they were little but she doesn't like him as a life partner, because she loves her cousin "Z" now he wasn't aware of "M's" feelings till one day M called Z telling him abt her feelings 4 him and stuff and till now he hasn't spoken to her which is so slack and ya M wants to suicide because of her bitch step mother who is everyday giving them a headache and also she told me that a few times her step mother has told them to "get of her house and leave the house and it's her house". no one knows about her situation and i am so grateful to know abt her situation before she did another stupid act of suicide or something to end her life.........

gosh i donno wat 2 do only god can understand how i feel b'coz right now while i'm thinking abt her facial expressions while she was telling me this i'm in tears and am out of control and crying well.....for now that's

*love hurts*

It is a FEELING dat lasts 4eva and it's a sand dat the deeper u fall into it the harder it is get out of and it only happens ONCE in a life time and it's a dream dat we all want to see and it's a wish dat ONLY comes true when both the LOVERS are in luv with each other hand in other words if the luv is on one side only it fails most of the times and den the luver's heart breaks into countless and tiny hard find 2 pieces and when u r BROKEN in LOVE den u feel as if the whole world has turned against you by "him/her n0t feeling the same for you"

happy 19th B'day (^_^)

hey pplz wassup? well it's ma birthday 2day and yah i turned 19 so it's like wird u know getting old very quick any how it was a good day @ da begining but den it got crapper and crapper as time went on like when it was 11am yesterday at skul u know ma bestie didn't even call me 2 @ least wish me a happy birthday but anyhow and also my mumdidn't even wished me a happy birthday so basically what i wanted 2 do was dat just see ma bestie the one who didn't call along wiff ma other bestie who was wiff me yesterday and have a good time and yah enjoy da moments but none of the above happened...........

oki
ta ta
smell ya laterz pplz

*so frustrating* (@)_(@)

hey pplz wassup? hopefully u r all gir8 and having fun anyhow i am just in the library doing some studies but before i come 2 da library i was walking down 2 the shopping witha friend of mine and talking in our own language and suddenly out of no where on earth this man (APPEARANCE: drunk, probably homeless)

he turned his face to us and said "hey u r in australia and u have to speak english not ur own bloody language"

i said "have u got a prob. sir with our language we know dat we r in australia"
he said "so stop *F***ing* speaking in ur language u bloody imports"
i got really angry dat i felt like bashing him up but i didn't end up doing it coz i wouldn't and i knew he was crazy
then i said "sir it's non of ur business wat language we apeak u stupid man"
he said "get lost and f**k off"

after dat i was still walking down 2 da shopping and un-fortunately he was going 2 da same shop as we were
afta dat we were still waling me and my friend and him infront of us that he just hit a lady "with hejab" with his elbow and walked passed them
i mean how stupid and un-human is that
and if he thinks no one shall speak in their own mother tongue den would he dare to say dat "to an aboriginal person" well the answer obviously is *NOOOOOOOOO* and he is just the stupid minority racist guy who wants every 1 to speak in english i mean wat if the gul i was speaking 2 doesn't know how to speak in english wat would happen then.....................?

anyways australia is a multicultural country now and no one can stop it becoming more and more diversed every day and every second no one not even john howard himself so yah
dat's all i had to say and i feel so sorry for dat Racist MAN coz he can not live like a peaceful person in australia despite the fact that we r a multicultural country. POOR HIM wat a pitty ue is just non-sense

ta ta
smell ya later ma bootiful friends

*I Wish You Knew* by Mariah Carey

I Wish You Knew

I've got to see you

Wherever you are

And I've got to be there

I'm wishing on stars

I've got to reveal what's inside of my heart

But the words escape me

And I'm paralyzed

So helpless when ILook into your eyes

[chorus]

And how I wish you only knew

What I feel inside for you

You probably haven't got a clue

But I wish you knewHow I love you baby

Honestly I know it's silly of me

To want you so badly

But keep it concealed

See my inferiority complex kicks in

And the words escape me

And I'm paralyzedSo helpless

when ILook into your eyes

[chorus]

And how I wish you only knew

What I feel inside for you

You probably haven't got a clue

But I wish you knew

How I love you baby

*we belong togetha*

We Belong Together by Mariah Carey


I didn't mean it

When I said I didn't love you so

I should have held on tight

I never should've let you go

I did nothingI was stupid

I was foolishI was lying to myself

I could not fathom that I would ever

Be without your love

Never imagined I'd be

Sitting here beside myself

I didn't know you

I didn't know me

But I thought I knew everything

I never felt

The feeling that I'm feeling now

Now that I don't

Hear your voice

Or even touch or even kiss your lips

Cause I don't have a choice

What I wouldn't give

To have you lying by my side

We belong together

When you left

I lost a part of me

It's still so hard to believe

Come back baby please

We belong together

Who else am I gonna lean on

When times get rough

Who's gonna talk to me

Till the sun comes up

Who's gonna take your place

Baby nobody else

We belong together

I can't sleep at night

When you're all on my mind

Bobby Womack's on the radio

Singing to me

'If you think you're lonely now'

Wait a minuteThis is too deep, too deep

I gotta change the station

So I turn the dial

Trying to catch a break

And then I hear Babyface

I only think of you

And it's breaking my heart

I'm trying to keep it together

But I'm falling apart

I'm feeling all out of my element

I'm throwing things

Crying

Trying to figure out

Where the hell I went wrong

The pain reflected in this song

Ain't even half of what

I'm feeling inside

I need youNeed you back in my life baby

When you left

I lost a part of me

It's still so hard to believe

Come back baby please

We belong together

Who else am I gonna lean on

When times get rough

Who's gonna talk to me

Till the sun comes up

Who's gonna take your place

There ain't nobody else

We belong together

*pearls and beads*

hello world and my beautiful friends how r u all? i hope u r all great and having fun and pleeeeeeeeeeease read dis story dat i'm about 2 start writing! it's a true life story of someone i know from ma far family friends who r living in Afghanistan!

Her great grandfather was the leader of 6 Big Colonies. He used to own a horse which was very dear and used 2 wear a gold necklace which at that time no one at all could afford 2 have. He had 2 wives and from them two he had 5 sons and 5 daughters alltogether. His sons and daughters got married before his death. He died when he was about 80 yrs old!

One of his sons named "S.B" also married twice (who's Aziza's grandfather) he had 4 sons and 4 daughters.
while his kids were growing up and then got married then after a few years the Taliban Regime started about 25-30 years ago.

As soon as Taliban Regime strated Afghanistan seemed a very unsafe place to live for every afghan resident as well as the B's Family.

The B's Family ran away from their place of birth called "Behsood" to hide away uoin the mountains of Behsood escaping from Taliban's cruelty that had started at that time.. This was like nothing they ever even thought of happening to their country and to its people.

After this S.B's sons were spreaded around afghanistan and weren't able to keep a contact with each other.
and from His 4 sons and 4 daughters one of his sons named "A.H" (who's Aziza's- father) got married as well and had 2 sons and 2 daughters. They were very poor which resulted from draught and war; they couldn't plant their crops and had nothing to eat and survive during the war times....

A.H had the responsibility to feed and take care and also provide shelter for his 4 children and his wife.
for a few years he struggling to do this till one day he gave up because he got sick and there was no way at all dat he could medicate himself or see a doctor at that time because he was very poor and no one else as well could help him because they were also very poor!

SO HE DIED!
he died of depression, poverty, post traumatic shock and heart attack!

from here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

After his death some people tried to help his family out by little bits and also his wife started sewing clothes from which she got money and used it to feed her 4 children: JR, Aziza, HD, and IM.

Aziza's mother got sick very badly and aziza's aunt found out about it and she rushed down to Aziza's house and took
(Aziza's mother) to Kabul from (Behsood-where they were living) to see a doctor. In their way to Kabul they had a very bad time taking care of her because she was in a very critical condition. The car had to travel on the bumpy roads and so it was moving a lot here and there and Aziza's mother was having such a bad time. After they got 2 Kabul hospital they had 2 register her in to the hospital 4 at least 1 night before she saw a doctor or anything!

Afterwards the doctor came to see her and then after he checked her, He asked Aziza to leave the room for a while and He then said to her aunt (do u know when u burn a wood and then a while later there's only ASH left in the end!) And I don't know how to say it but, that is exactly how Aziza's mother's internal organs are at the moment because of dehydration and starvation (ofcorse they had not enough food 2 eat because she fed her children all the food they had and didn't care about herself)
And "it's a very very sever case and there's only 5% chance u her life and can not be guaranteed in another 10 minutes" the doctor said!

1 minute; 3 minutes; 5 minutes; 7 minutes; 9 minutes and at the 10th minute.............................

She died! GOD BLESS HER SOUL :(

After Aziza's mother's death they were left all alone by themselves to take care of themselves and each other, just like a night without a moon!

It was like a God SEND Angel (her grandfather- mum's father); he took the so-called responsibility of being their legal guardian and taking care of his 4 grand kids 1. Aziza 2.JR 3.IM 4.HD

But nobody knew what future held for these 4 poor and (desperate for love) kids and.............the future was that their grand father started abusing them everyday on every little thing u know even when Aziza couldn't cook properly and occurs she wouldn't b able to because she was only 7 when her mother died and she had no idea about what to do for herself and her siblings! So when Jawahir (her older sister) turned 14 her grandpa then gives her away to an old man aged 5o yrs old and technically sells her and yah!

*SO SLACK OF HIM- HE MUST'VE BEEN AN ARSE HOLE*
And...............

On top of everything else that Old Man was already married and had four boys from his first wife. His first wife used to abuse her as well and once she abused her so viciously that resulted into JR to lose her first baby in her tummy while she was only 5 weeks pregnant. However surprisingly her OLD man husband likes JR. Aziza along with her two brothers were separated from her grand father and lives alone now by herself with her 2 brothers. Her brothers are also abusing her now and still are abusing her as we speak! so she has to do everything from cooking to dusting the whole house and on top of everything she has to put up with her two brothers abusive behavior after what her grandfather used to abuse her before they get separated from him;
Now............... the only HOPE she has is me and my mother only and we occasionally send money 2 her so that at least she has something 2 wear while she gets out of her old and rented house :( SO I am looking forward that if some one out there is reading or listening to my story and is willing to help AZIZA get out of this abusive and devastating life! and some 1 out there who can actually sponsor her 2 Australia because she is definitely worth sponsoring and I’m sure and I can guarantee anyone out there that she'll do whatever it takes to get on her feet and get somewhere and understand this world and also to show her uncles and aunts that she deserves more than what they used to think for her! Actually her uncles and aunts never cared about her nor about her other siblings after their parents' deaths offcourse, so that is another problem on top of her hardship living life that she has to go through everyday!

SO BASICALLY SHE HAS NO ONE TO LOOK UP TO AND ABSOLUTELY NO ONE AT ALL 2 TRUST!

and u know how hard it is in Afghanistan to b a 14 yr old orphan girl and taking care of your brothers and also in Afghanistan there's this STUPID tradition that as soon as a girl becomes 15 people come to her home asking for her hand (asking her 2 get married with their son) so just imagine how would she feel coz no one will come 2 ask for her hand and even if they did by any chance what so ever there's no one 2 give her all that stuff that she'll need before getting married and going 2 her husband's house We call it "JEHEZZ" which the girls in Afghanistan sew them themselves e.g. bed covers, table covers, cupboard covers, coat covers, pillow covers, blanket covers, and etc. (basically household needs) and some families even ask for a washing machine, a fridge and a TV from the girl's family before they say yes to the marriage (arrange-marriage in most cases).So if these things didn't happen then I’m 99.99% sure that she'll b sold 2 some 1 old perhaps in his 50s or 60s and then she would suffer the same as her big sister JAWAHIR, or even worse!

SO PLZ THINK ABOUT IT!

smell ya later people have a sweet day
luv u all